Relationships are like my macbook. I felt on top of the world when I got it but after the honeymoon period it decided to die on me and I lost everything (everything!). Now its come down to me sellotaping the chipped corners I wish to pretend are not there.
Just like my Macbook relationships hardly ever stay the same, they too tend to need a reboot every now and then. But why do relationships change? Everything seems normal and then one day you realise just how distant you’ve become and feel sad in knowing what you once had is drifting away.
It’s difficult to accept that sometimes it is impossible to regain the closeness you once had with friends. For example, like the closeness you shared in high school, now that things are different and you’ve all made separate choices, life is taking you to different places and the odd dinner or sleep over just doesn’t seem to cut it anymore. Gone are the days of walking to school together every morning and lunching at ‘Michaels café’!
So are we destined to pointlessly create relationships, waiting for the chemistry to die or the person to change (or vice versa)? Or is there hope in knowing that when you make a relationship work it will always be the same?
There are many factors that contribute to relationships changing. For example, the economic climate, stress and mostly life in general tends to get in the way. One minute you’re like Ant and Dec and the next thing you know its Katie and Peter all over again. Sometimes expectations are too high or we take the relationship for granted and feel there is no need to put forth effort, as we are comfortable in knowing that the other person will always ‘be there’. Other times, it might just be that a difference in opinion may have raised some issues.
People just have different ways of coping with things and sometimes the relationship gets affected. But is the change necessarily always a bad thing? As the saying goes, ‘every cloud has a silver lining’ so maybe it depends on how you cope with this change, it could be an opportunity for an improved relationship.
Sometimes change allows for an advantageous chance, whilst some relationships when coming up against this change will freeze up and wonder what went wrong others will take the chance and continue to run (just like my Macbook)! Perhaps the change will create some distance at first but it also creates a chance to put forth more effort and maintain a happy relationship.