As Nelly Furtado once chimed ‘all good things must come to an end’, and as ever, the Portuguese/Canadian songstress is not wrong. Yes. We are just hours away from the beginning of the end – of Big Brother. The once ground breaking social experiment which bought us a sedate guitar playing nun and a kindly builder…and which later bought us Kinga doing THAT with a bottle and Nikki Graham – is entering into the twilight zone. Just as this summer will end, so will this franchise, relegated to TV nostalgia countdowns and the occasional wistful backward glances of generation Y. No more leather clad, perma-eye brow raised Davina, no more regional accented voice overs, no more pneumatic blondes, no more sexually curious extroverts or buttoned up toffs – no more nothing. God, The Sharpener is reading like a bitesize guide to Nietzsche today.
Like a mercurial great power, Big Brother has both provided and taken away. For the last ten years Big Brother has peppered the conversations of playgrounds, kitchen suppers and building sites alike. We’ve jeered and cheered people we think we know, watched their rise and demise, and torn them to shreds as they gasp for the oxygen of publicity we once bathed them in. But now it seems that our taste in reality TV have become all the more demeaning and complex. We don’t want three months of people lying in the sun picking their nose, we want three months of people performing live – totally exposed to the Facebook hate groups, the searing editorials and unflattering pictures. We want FAMOUS people breaking down and destroying their careers, we want NON FAMOUS people breaking down and jeopardising their newfound careers. Big Brother, with all it’s horrid tasks and food deprivation just doesn’t cut the mustard any more.
So who will be crowned this year’s winner? The Daily Mail are today introducing us to the young lambs preparing to be thrown to the lions – which *yawn* include a plastic-surgery obsessed playboy model, a former Miss. England, a Beyonce lookalike, a scientist AND a dwarf. What a delectable collection of vulnerable people for us mock and critique.
Just remember – please do not swear.