Ah Dante’s Inferno, an epic poem written in the fourteenth century by Dante Alighieri as part of his masterpiece, The Divine Comedy. I wonder what grandiose video game Electronic Arts have created based around this extravagant prose? Hang on a minute. A hack and slash platform game? Something must be wrong here…
Well believe it or not, Dante’s Inferno is indeed just that. It’s a bloodthirsty platformer too, with more than its fair share of gore and brutal carnage for you to feast your eyes upon. You play the part of Dante himself, and you have to travel through the nine levels of hell to rescue your sweetheart. And if you happen to be still going through puberty, then you will be pleased to hear that it has plenty of breasts to boot. Breasts here, breasts there, huge heaving breasts everywhere! It’s like every boyhood dream surely?
Although visually it seems to have been inspired by a teenage fantasy, the breasts do tend to become slightly mind-numbing after a while. Thankfully, the rest of the graphics are much more pleasing to the eye, and as a journey through hell, the scenery is amazing. Rivers of blood and walls of tortured souls really help top set the scene.
Gameplay-wise, if you have ever played God of War, then you will know what to expect. Gigantic bosses are there to be slain, and when I say gigantic, I mean huge sprawling monstrosities. You basically run around killing any demon you happen to come across with a scythe or enchantments, opening chests to replenish your energy or magic and when you come across a wayward soul, you can decide to punish or absolve them. This basically gives you holy or unholy points to spend on weapons upgrades. Not very original, I know, but then the game as a whole is hardly that innovative!
The music that plays throughout is great, and lends itself to the setting, sounding as it does as a cross between a church choir and a film score. The noise of tortured souls does begin to grate somewhat after a while, and the battles are stupendously loud. You’ll find yourself reaching for the volume switch after a short while.
The game is easy to play, and after a few hours you will have completed it on the easiest difficulty level. And herein lies the main gripe I have with Dante’s Inferno. No, it’s not that it is unoriginal or too easy. Rather, the further you get into the game, the less effort seems to have been made with the levels, graphic and general gameplay. The game starts so strongly, and the level of presentation is incredible, but then it rapidly petters off. It’s almost as if the designers spent all their energy on making the first couple of levels superb, and then just couldn’t be bothered with the rest of it. Take the second level of the game, Lust, as an example. The scenery and demons that inhabit this hellish plane are something to behold, albeit with possibly too many boobs, but after this visual feast, the next levels are a pale shade. Instead of splatter-house shockers to combat, you only have tame wizards and zombies. What happened to all the effort of earlier? Worth a rent, for sure, but prepare to be short-changed if you are thinking about spending your hard-earned money on this one…
