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Review: Jackass 3D – Paindemonium
9th November 2010 | 5 comments | 2 people like this
A flesh-coloured dildo flies arrow-straight through the air, as majestic in high definition 3D slow motion as any blue-skinned alien rendered painstakingly over a million man hours in Avatar, and far more interesting. Its trajectory takes it from left to right above miniatures of some of the world’s capital cities before slamming it into the face of a middle aged man and ricocheting off course in a fantastic pirouette as...
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Review: Toy Story 3 – Playtime is over
23rd July 2010 | 2 comments | 1 person likes this
Like all of Pixar’s movies, Toy Story 3 isn’t really for kids. I’m verging on massive condescension with that statement, because of course the cartoony liveliness of the onscreen action is stimulating to the mealy-mouthed, teat-feeding youth of this world. However, I don’t think that any film in this venerable franchise, or any of the studio’s other work, comes closer to being an adult-oriented film.
I was nine years old when... -
B-Movie overload: Three Movies, One Review
26th April 2010 | 1 comments | 1 person likes this
Big budgets do not translate into good movies. To once more flog the dead but beautifully rendered body of the Navi, James Cameron's Avatar is a perfect example of this. Without the budget, film makers are forced to be a bit more inventive with their craft, for good or ill, and the B-Movie is the result. These three films are aparently amongst the most popular B-Movies of all time. But...
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Review: Alice in Wonderland – Dear Tim
8th March 2010 | 7 comments | 2 people like this
Dear Tim Burton,
I went to see your new film at the weekend. Alice in Wonderland. In 3D. With a Disney stamp on it and that lady who worked on Beauty and the Beast and The Lion King behind the writing desk.
Now, I’m not a 3D-sceptic Tim, let’s get that straightened out. I like the depth it gives to the images, and I like the clarity of picture you get with... -
Rubbish Classics Part 2: The 13th Warrior and The Specialist/Assassins
19th February 2010 | 3 comments | 1 person likes this
Remember VHS tapes? They were those massive black things, as thick as nearly 20 DVDs (trust me, I just did a comparison) that provided grainy pictures and had the fatal flaw of deteriorating over time. This meant that your favourite films would die a slow death whilst rubbish ones sat on the shelf in pristine condition. Remember pausing VHS tapes? You couldn’t see anything for the blur and screen tearing....
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Review: Avatar World Premiere outshines movie?
11th December 2009 | 6 comments | 3 people like this
As I walked down the blue carpet, herded away from the celebrities and stars and hustled into the Empire cinema at Leicester Square, I couldn’t help thinking that perhaps the choice of carpet colour was a little inappropriate. It would be like going to see a film about a group of bananas with brains* and arriving by walking over a carpet made out of fruit. To be fair, I was...
CONTRIBUTOR
Joe West
Joe is a writer based in the UK. He is passionate about films, as well as video games and literature, and regularly blogs about new releases as well as forgotten classics and undiscovered gems from around the globe. Sometime's you'll find his posts peppered with fruity, pretentious language, but he means well.
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